Winter Break is on the horizon, and while my friends prepare to go everywhere from their hometowns to Cabo to California to catch some rays and let loose, I prepare to combat raindrops and navigate my way through all of the British slang I need to brush up on in a rather tame trip to London.
I affectionately call England “the Motherland.” As you guessed it, my mum was born and raised there. Yet each time I go back to visit, I’m still as confused and amused at some of the phrases and quirks there as I was the time before.
I’ve compiled a list of some of the best words, phrases, and items so that you, too, can understand what might throw this yank out of whack across the pond:
1) “All right?”
This is used often around London and the south to mean, “Hello, how are you”? It is said to both people you know and strangers alike. If I had a nickel- err…pound…- for each time someone asked me “all right?” in London and it snowballed into a very awkward moment, I would be able to fly first class back to America with Sir Richard Branson himself plopped right in the seat beside me. Am I alright? Yes, I’m fine! Am I? What do you respond back…”yes” ? I really had no idea why people kept saying that to me or what a satisfactory response would be but thank GOD I’m in the know now.
2) Marmite
The Brits love this spread and slather it on toast like Paula Dean slathers on butter. When I visited my cousins last year, they had tubs and tubs of Marmite, and even had little to-go pods of it. I had high hopes that my taste buds may have matured, so I decided to give it a try again for the first time in years. NOPE! Still tastes like burnt earwax and still boggles my mind that people willingly consume it.
3) “Mutton dressed as lamb”
The British certainly have a way with words. They can even ‘throw shade’ at someone and make it sound posh. This phrase is an offensive way of saying that a woman’s clothing or style of dressing is way too young for her age. Think Regina George’s mom in Mean Girls, or any woman ever who’s tried to pull off graphic tees, bedazzled jeans or tube tops over the age of 30. It’s probably a handy phrase to know so you don’t go looking around for the farm animals everyone keeps talking about.
4) Black Pudding
Why are they confusing us like this? The pudding that we are familiar with in America does not necessarily translate to England. Brits will refer to any dessert as ‘pudding’, but it can also be a savory dish. Black pudding is certainly NOT a dessert. It’s actually a blood sausage. It’s generally made with pigs’ blood, pork fat, onions, oats, barley and spices, and is cooked down until it’s nice and thick and then stuffed in a length of intestine. I know, I know. This is most commonly served with a full English breakfast.
5) “Taking the piss”
This is the British version of “making fun” of someone or something. It’s a pretty common phrase, although the trouble here lies with the fact that British humor is quite different and a lot more sarcastic than American humor. So, not only will you be confused as to what someone means when they say they are taking the piss, but you also probably won’t even catch on to the fact that they were making fun of you to begin with. It’s a tricky world out there.
6) Chav
The England equivalent for a “white trash” person. A stereotypical poor, uneducated person who oftentimes behaves in a brash or vulgar manner and wears ostentatious clothing or jewelry. Think Jersey Shore, except instead of Ed Hardy they cover themselves in Burberry check. Now, contrary to what Americans might think, nobody with an ounce of respect for themselves would be seen in the designer’s signature print these days.
7) “All fur coat and no knickers”
Ah, my personal favorite. A phrase that so perfectly describes those who try to be something they aren’t, such as the people who show off their new Chanel Boy bag but can’t even afford their rent. Knickers are underwear, by the way. So the phrase is saying that people’s boasting could all be on the surface, and we don’t know what’s going on underneath or behind closed doors. I find this extremely relevant in the world of social media, where people brag about what they have or what they’re doing and give others “FOMO” when in reality, it could be all for show…
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