At the beginning of this year, I was a second semester student at the Charlotte School of Law. Yet now at the close of the year, I am a first semester graduate student at Wake Forest University School of Divinity.
In reflecting back over this past year, I could easily say that it has been stressful, hectic, lonely, depressing, frustrating, and tiresome. Indeed, all of those things would be true. But I could also just as easily say that this year has bestowed upon me an abundance of blessings. It taught me the most about myself and it allowed me to catch just a glimpse of how God sees me.
From a young age, I knew that I was called into the ministry, as some may believe we all are who identify as Christians. However, I had no real intention of going into the ministry and serving God in that manner. I would have much rather lived my quiet life as just another member of society, not really stepping much out of bounds or doing things differently. However, then this past summer of 2012, I received a phone call that changed my life. It was from an old friend whom I had gone to high school with and it reaffirmed my calling to the ministry more than ever. It was then that I decided that I could no longer run from who I was.
Within talking to her, I realized that God had given me a job to do and so I had to accept the call.
Now, here I am about five months later, finishing up my first semester of divinity school. It has not been an easy journey. There has been set back after set back, and one pitfall after the next. Things have gotten so bad for me that I seriously contemplated dropping out of school all together and questioned my place in ministry.
But something inside of me just wouldn’t let me quit. For some reason, I’ve just never believed that quitting was an option. As I pushed forward and pressed on [ever in the face of adversity], I could feel my faith getting stronger. I could feel my dependence on God growing more every day. I knew that the adversity was just strengthening my relationship with God. And it took me an entire semester to realize that.
When I look back over that moment when I was about to quit, I think about how God has to break us sometimes in order for us to heal the right way, or so that we may grow properly. God needed to show me that it is Him who I needed to depend on wholeheartedly and nobody else, not even those who were closest to me.
I say all of that to say: God works in mysterious ways.
“When I look back over that moment when I was about to quit, I think about how God has to break us sometimes in order for us to heal the right way, or so that we may grow properly. God needed to show me that it is Him who I needed to depend on wholeheartedly and nobody else, not even those who were closest to me.”(Shironosov, iStockphoto/ Thinkstock)
What we may see as punishment, God may be using as preparation to take us higher in Christ and in life. Though it is great to not despise humble beginnings, do not despise painful beginnings. We all have promises, purpose, and potential stored up inside of us. Just like birthing a baby is painful, so too is the birthing process for your purpose.
Just think of each circumstance as a contraction bringing you closer and closer to delivery. You can do it! God believes in you! If God didn’t think you could do it, He wouldn’t have planted that purpose, promise and potential inside of you. It may hurt, but just brace yourself in God’s Word and your pregnancy/process will be over before you know it.
Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., said it best when he said, “For the crowns we wear, there is the cross we must bear.” I just thought that sentiment to be absolutely astounding. What he was saying is that our promise may come at a price, but that you will still receive the promise –nonetheless.
So just think of it this way, at the end of the nine months of pain, frustration, and exhaustion the woman is blessed with the gift of new life, and so will you as well. Be blessed and stay focused. Know that your promise is surely on the way.
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