Flashback to that scene from Mean Girls when The Plastics (plus Lindsey Lohan) are all huddled around Georgina’s tiny mirror. Each girl takes a turn exclaiming how grotesque a certain part of her body looks. Lohan looks confused. She struggles to come up with just one thing that sounds even remotely unlikeable about herself.
Now, I really have a hard time believing that most people walk about with that kind of confidence on a daily basis – even if they grew up saying “Jambo” to people. Cross-culturally, leaving the safety of your home and into the world where people will judge you based on appearance, ability, socioeconomic status, appetite, sexual orientation, style, manner of speech, etc would make any human stop and re-evaluate him or herself.
“Is there anything wrong with me?”
Let’s start by saying, “Yes, of course, there’s something wrong with you.”
Genetically speaking, no human has been unaffected by some type of mutation. You can call these mutations or you could go the traditional route and call them differences. A mole on the tip of your nose? Furry eyebrows? Frizzy hair? Hips that don’t lie?
Those physical traits might not make you a “model,” but remember that most models don’t even look like models. With Photoshop, artists cam simply edit out the bits of your genes that society deems unappealing this century. A little extra tummy? No problem. A virtual tummy tuck will fix that. Eyes that vary in size? Let’s just do a little virtual resizing. The digital age is amazing in many ways but when it comes to fueling your self-esteem, I wouldn’t recommend scrolling through the overly retouched pages of the latest Victoria’s Secret catalog.
If only the insecurities stopped at physical appearance. Whether you are coming out of the closet or worried about how to eat apples with braces, it’s important to remember that there are other people feeling just as insecure as you – about the same things!
Battle those fears of being judged by talking about it! There is a certain release that comes with speaking about your insecurities.
Once you expose yourself, you eliminate anyone else’s need to expose you. And being strong enough to talk about your issue will help you find those other like-minded individuals also struggling with the same problems. The people who may laugh and bully you only do so because they think you don’t have support. More than likely, the person laughing at you in struggling with their own insecurity and having a hard time finding allies. There is strength in numbers and power in self-expression.
Next time you’re on your way out the door and choose to stop by the mirror for a quick makeup check, glob on more concealer and ask yourself, “What’s wrong with me?” Instead, remind yourself what an awesome compilation of genetic mutations you are.