Relationships can be very complicated. But they can also be very simple, if we learn from the past and apply those lessons to the future. Here’s a collection of things that I’ve learned from previous relationships that might be helpful to you:
1. You need to be with someone who truly supports your dreams and ambitions. If they don’t and you feel like they are only a distraction, kick them to the curve.
2. Anyone who really cares for you will act like they do. Take the people for how they are the very first time they show you their true selves.
3. Looks fade, so make sure the personality is on point. Sorry to break it to you, but we will all age and looks will fade overtime. Just saying!
4. Realize that people can suck and treat you wrong in relationships. But, don’t let that discourage you. Brush it off and know that what goes around comes back around and the perfect person for you is on the way.
5. Any relationship, friendship or romantic, needs trust. If you can’t trust the one you’re with or they somehow are never able to trust you, it’s not going to work.
6. It’s time to move on when your partner is more into putting you down than lifting you up. You need to be you in a relationship, not what someone wants to transform you into being the best person you can be.
7. Make sure to really grasp that sexual intimacy complicates things and shouldn’t be entered into lightly. Each decision, whether others would consider it flighty, prudish, slutty, responsible and irresponsible. Therefore, it should be made with care and forethought.
8. Listening is an important skill in life; it’s even more important in relationships.
9. Sometimes the best relationships aren’t romantic. Friendships count as relationships too. Cultivate them as you would any other.
10. Connection is everything. If it’s not there and you’re trying to force it, then you need to force yourself to move on.
11. But, even if there is a connection that doesn’t mean two people are meant to be together forever. Relationships can be for a reason or a season.
12. Heal past hurts before beginning a new relationship so you don’t punish the next for something they haven’t done. But be aware that relationships can come unexpectedly.
13. If someone really likes you and cares for you, they will really try to make the relationship work. Don’t just takes their words for it. Make sure their words stand with actions.
14. Don’t make someone your priority when they only make you their option. So when the other person doesn’t care, then you shouldn’t either.
15. Do not, and we repeat, do not be ‘thirsty’ for the person to change. There are billions of people in the world and you will meet someone else. Take everything at face value. It is what it is.
16. Remember, that you have a lot to offer and if one person doesn’t see that, then they don’t deserve to be with you.
17. Sometimes, you just have to pull the plug and cut the relationship if it isn’t working. We need to learn when enough is enough, and to stop trying.
18. Do not be with people who are going to put you on an emotional roller coaster. It’s not worth your time and your energy, or lack thereof.
19. Love yourself wholeheartedly, and remember that you deserve to be with the best. Never settle.
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